The Fast Lane: episode guide

Confusion by Numbers

Episode 1.1
Thu, March 07, 1985
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight

Bryce and Ken are hired to perform as security at a wedding — guarding the presents. There, an old friend hires Bryce and Ken for a lucrative accounting investigation. Pat arrives in Melbourne and finds work after the newspaper misprints Bryce and Ken's ad for a secretary under rooms for rent.©tzuk

Starring: Terry Bader as Bryce, Richard Healy as Ken, Debra Lawrance as Pat

With: Peter Hosking as Blair, Denzil Howson as Mullins, Edward Hepple as Sherwood, Alan Fletcher as Collins, Kirsty Child as Eunice, Frank Garfield as David, Rodney Sharp as Frank, Ray Chubb as Jack, Helen Tripp as Edith, Jennifer Jarman-Walker as Celebrant, Lloyd Cunningham as Wedding Guest

Upping the Integrity

Episode 1.2
Thu, March 14, 1985
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight
Directed by Lindesay Dresdon

The Excelsior Research Foundation is hired by an advertising agency to investigate the theft of a marketing campaign. Pat enrolls in modelling course to expose the company's business practices.©tzuk

With: John Gregg as Adrian, Tina Bursill as Felicity, Peter Adams as Price, Peter Hosking as Blair, Vikki Hammond as O'Rourke, Murielle Salter as Elsie, Andrew Knight as Spears, Chris Waters as Miles, Rodney Sharp as Frank, Linda Hartley as Eileen, Danny Nash as Darren, Raymond Dray as Sid, Ray Chubb as Jack, Graham Dow as M.C.

Portrait of Whistler's Underwriter

Episode 1.3
Thu, March 21, 1985
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight
Directed by Lindesay Dresdon, Noel Price

A friend of Bryce's father hires the Excelsior Research Foundation to investigate thefts from his private art collection.©tzuk

With: Alex Scott as Klein, Peter Hosking as Blair, John Clarke as Tanner, Alton Harvey as Henry, Suzy Cato as Julletta, Gaynor Martin as Pippa, Wanda Davidson as Mary, Simon Roger as Lawyer, Ed Turley as Old Man, Rodney Sharp as Frank, Margaret Steven as Matriarch Jack Mobbs as McBride, Peter Lord as Trimble, Jon Sidney as Lex, Ray Chubb as Jack, Bruce Kane as Hood

Tertiary Sisyphus

Episode 1.4
Thu, March 28, 1985
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight

A case of mistaken identity leads to Ken going undercover as an academic after he and Bryce are hired to examine the reason for the suspiciously high pass-rate in a difficult university English course.©tzuk

With: Barry Otto as Daniells, Chris Hallam as Carmichael, Marie Redshaw as Fitzgerald, Robert Van Mackelenberg as Travis, Maggie Millar as Simone Duxbury, Rona McLeod as Marion, Lyn Semmler as Rebecca, Jacqui Gordon as Megan, Johannah Sonenberg as Clown

Irreconcilable Similarities

Episode 1.5
Thu, April 04, 1985
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight
Directed by Colin Budds

An analytical man hires the Excelsior Research Foundation to investigate his wife's extramarital liaisons. Pat steps in to deliver a package on behalf of Bryce and Ken getting all three involved in a dangerous drug ring.

With: Peter Hosking as Blair, Gerard Maguire as Bill Martin, Lindy Davies as Barbara, Victor Kazan as Victor, Tommy Dysart as Neville, Mark Neal as Ralphe, Stephen Hutchinson as Kel, George Vidalis as Bruno, Ray Chubb as Jack

A Mug's Game

Episode 1.6
Thu, April 11, 1985
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight

A small town drainage authority hires Bryce and Pat to investigate clerical corruption. A lucky gambler runs afoul of townsfolk in the local pub. Meanwhile, Ken tries to sort out a few personal problems.

With: Neil Melville as Wallace, Terry Gill as Mayor, Bettina Eijsma as Sandy, Peter Browne as Bob, Bruce Knappett as Barman, Bill Bennett as Clements, Cliff Ellen as Brooks, Ed Rosser as Henderson, Kylie Flinker as Tracey, David Swwann as Riddock, Basil Hull as Dr Brown, Ray Chubb as Jack; Mark Shirrefs, David Bickerstaff, Ian Mumby, Ron Little

The Sound of One Hand Counting

Episode 1.7
Thu, April 18, 1985
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight

Pat is sent to work undercover in a factory to investigate thefts from the shop floor. Bryce and Ken are assigned to investigate the callous factory manager's wife only to find themselves participating in a New Age self-improvement course.

With: Stephen Grives as Douglas, William Zappa as Steve, Anna Maria Winchester, John Clarke (voice), et al

The Below Average Samaritan

Episode 1.8
Thu, April 25, 1985
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight

Bryce and Ken are hired by an elderly man to locate his missing granddaughter. The fiancé of Ken's ex-wife asks him to be the Best Man at their wedding.

With: Peter Hosking as Blair, Bettina Eijsma as Sandy, Peter Browne as Bob, Mark Mithcell as Derek, Rod Zuanic as Flynn, Marcus Binks as Sharkie, Craig Mercer as Snake, Jackie Woodburne as Ruth, John Penman as Damien, Rodney Sharp as Frank, Rosie Sturgess as Dry Cleaner, Keith Eden as Lance, Ernest Wilson as Les, Sue Jones as Williams, Kylie Flinker as Tracey, Chris Gaffney as Bill, Heather Howard as Woman, Taylor Owynns as Woman, Vernon Wells as Man

All's Well That Himfella Buggerup Finish

Episode 1.9
Thu, May 02, 1985
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight
Directed by Lindesay Dresdon

Interpol, Mr Big, murder, heroin and intrigue form just another day's work for the bumbling duo at Excelsior who prove once again that when the going gets tough they are completely out of their league.

With: Bryan Marshall as Kingdom, Peter Hosking as Blair, Lloyd Cunnington as Chief, Alex Menglet as Harwood, Rodney Sharp as Frank, Jane Turner as Waitress, Jim Ewing as Alsop, Ray Chubb as Jack, Lynn-Maree Smith as Bank Teller

Should Auld Acquaintances Be Given a Fairly Wide Berth

Episode 2.1
Tue, October 27, 1987 (9:30)
Written by John Clarke and Andrew Knight
Directed by Mandy Smith

Bryce and Ken are recruited by the Ministry for Cultural Advancement to track down a couple of esoteric, cultural fringe-dwellers who have absconded with their grants for 'Celebrate Australia Day'.

With: Pamela Rabe, Genevieve Picot as Miriam, Wilbur Wilde, et al

Following By Example

Episode 2.2
Tue, November 03, 1987
Written by Andrew Knight
Directed by Collin Budds

The coach of an amateur football club, impressed with Bryce's new ideals on personal motivation (gleaned from self-help tapes), hires him to boost the team's morale given they have not won a game in twelve years. Meanwhile, Ken and Pat head off in search of the team's "star" footballer who has been brainwashed into a sect led by Lance Purvis, a former Dandenongs butcher turned religious guru.

With: John Wood as Don, Don Bridges as Rex, Peter Curtin as Lance, Peter Hosking as Blair, Gary Adams as Parker, Simon Thorpe as Brad, Anne Phelan as Beth, Craig Reardon as Gary, Alan Lovett as Minister, Tanya Simonow as Minister's Wife, Tanya Uren as Waitress, Marilyn O'Donnell as Umpire, Stephen Hatch as Hutch, Margaret Downey as Nadene, Magda Szubanski as Sue

Charming Little Bijou Enterprise in Prime Position — Suit Magistrate

Episode 2.3
Tue, November 10, 1987
Written by Max Dann

Keel, an unscrupulous real estate agent, has persuaded a woman to sell her home for far below its real price so Keel can benefit by its resale. Keel's assistant, Portman, fed up with his boss and his crafty schemes, enlists the help of Ken and Bryce to carry out a careful plan.

With: Gary Down as Portman, Gary Day as Keel, Meg Clancy as Gloria, Peter Hosking as Blair, Gary Adams as Parker, Dean Nichols as Petracini, Beverley Phillips as Mrs Scott, Esme Melville as Mrs, Mantler, Peter Black as Morgan, Reg Gorman as Lou, Mark Torpy as Quentin, John Chilton as Thomas, Suzie Davis as Receptionist, Louis Dingemans as Daley

Holding the Mirror up to Itself

Episode 2.4
Tue, November 17, 1987
Written by John Alsop and Andrew Knight

Bryce and Ken are shadowed by a method actor looking to find out what makes a detective tick. Needing an impressive case, Bryce makes up a story about a diamond heist so they can "recover" the stolen goods. Meanwhile, Pat runs into bureaucratic roadblocks when she takes up the cause of couple whose house is being affected by an excavation on the neighbouring council-owned property.

With: Peter Hosking as Blair, Andrew Clarke as Bill, Conor McDermottroe as Snipe, Jillian Murray as Pippa, Fiona Corke as Susie, Brad Robinson as Judd, Fiona Spence as Peg, John Flaus as Jim, John Bishop as Craig Morris, Tim Hughes as Sollicitor, Jenny Seedsman as Planning Officer, John Larking as Shire Engineer, Tom Travers as Waterboard Officer, Gary Adams as Parker, Mark Zandle as Kepler, Myles Sharpe as Security Guard

Murder Most Fouled

Episode 2.5
Tue, November 24, 1987
Written by Robyn Walton

Bryce, Ken and Pat go undercover at a country guesthouse to solve a series of antique thefts. Before long, Bryce reveals his true identity to investigate a murder — a difficult task given he has no body, no clues, and no shortage of suspects.

With: Shane Briant as Leonard, Kris McQuade as Zola, Reg Evans as Dr. Chisholm, Charles Tingwell as Bertie, Catherine Milte as Jane, Dominic Sweeney as Tad, Maud Clark as Susan, Ian Walker as Bank Manager, Ron Pinnell as Chemist, Patti Perkins as Mrs Faulding

The Gods Must Be Extremely Badly Advised

Episode 2.6
Tue, December 01, 1987
Written by Deborah Parsons
Directed by Peter Dodds

Bryce and Ken are hired to provide market research for a confectionery company and find themselves in the middle of a union dispute.

With: John Doyle as Tony, Dalibor Satalic as Rino, Bob Ruggiero as Sylvio, Regina Gaigalas as Tamara, Howard Stanley as Barry, Lynda Gibson as Magda, Sydney Jackson as Warren, Bettina Eijsma as Sandy, Peter Brown as Bob, Will Deumer as Flange, George Kapiniaris as Arly, George Trotman as Stan, Susie Fraser as Linda, Dorothy Cutts as Woman Shopper James McRae as Man Shopper

Rosencrantz & Guildernstern Aren't Very Well

Episode 2.7
Tue, December 08, 1987
Written by John Clarke, Richard Healy, Andrew Knight
Based on a phone call from Geoff Kelso

Ken and Bryce are on the hook for costly repairs after they are hired to de-bug a suburban home. The pair are then approached to make a dead drop on behalf of a popular talk radio host who is being blackmailed over his illegitimate child. When the man who picks up the money is later found dead, Ken and Bryce are arrested for murder.

With: Peter Hosking as Blair, Gary Adams as Parker, Robert Coleby as Dwyer, Kim Gyngell as Lynch, John Sheerin as Honeyset, Norman Yemm as Fellows, Deborah-Lee Furness as Stella, Douglas Hedge as Mulligan, Bill Baxter as Dittman, Joe Camilleri as Santini, Mickey Camilleri as Policewoman, Susie Fraser as Linda, et al

All the World's Going Through a Bit of a Stage

Episode 2.8
Tue, December15, 1987

Ken and Bryce are hired to discover the identity of a mystery playwright.

With: ...

My Dinner with Agnes

Episode 2.9
Tue, December 22, 1987
Written by Max Dann and Andrew Knight
Directed by Mandy Smith

Ken and Bryce are asked to observe a group of students to discover who has been stealing building materials from the school. When the identify the thief, Ken has second thoughts about reporting them. Pat is preoccupied with her aunt and uncle, her newly engaged cousin, and her cousin's flirtatious fiancé. Ken and Bryce attempt to serve a summons on a marathon-running security guard.

With: Peter Hosking as Blair, Gary Adams as Parker, Narelle Stephens as Agnes, Beverley Dunn as Rona, Laurie Dobson as Clifford, Wendy Tynan as Bibby, Mitchell Faircloth as Craig, Margo Knight as Faye, Peter Finley as Russell, Ross Newton as Robby, Carole Yelland as Gaye, Amanda Collever as Social Worker, Chris Gaffney as Mr James, Norma Brown as Jean, Andrea Butcher as Waitress, Mike Johnson as Joseph Zeimaniwicz

Je Regrette Tout

Episode 2.10
Tue, December 29, 1987
Written by John Alsop and Andrew Knight

An irishman is sent to Melbourne on a mission involving an ecumenical conference. When the suspected terrorist misses his contact at the airport, he happens across an ad for the Excelsior Research Foundation and hires them to locate her. With Pat making plans to get married and move overseas, Ken and Bryce both make their feelings known.

With: Peter Hosking as Blair, Patrick Dickinson as Finbar, Heather Mitchell as Eileen, Gary Adams as Parker, Robin Dene as Seamus, John McKelvey as Boss, Christopher Stevenson as Customs Official One, Andrew Martin as Andrew Mitchell, Loren Daniel as Receptionist, Ross Williams as Priest, Stephen Sculley as Station Assistant, George Viskich as Salesman Jean Kittson as Reporter One, Andrew Spence as Reporter Two, Neville Stonehouse as Taxi Driver, Jenni Kubler as Clerk, Susie Fraser as Linda, Alex Duke as Cameron, Penelope Shelton as Woman, Di O'Connor as Woman; Simon Westaway [uncredited]